Have you ever heard “You are perfect just the way you are?” I support people with that affirmation all the time and yet some do not believe it. People may ask, “If I am perfect, then why transform? Or change anything?” Of course, their life may have some issues still and they do not want to “rock the boat.” Instead, you could say, “I am perfect and yet I could be so much more.”
I have been teaching transformational workshops and involved in transformation over thirty-seven years and have found that people are afraid to change. You may want more money, better relationships, better health, but the fear of the unknown stops you in your tracks. Getting outside of your comfort zone can be scary. So, you end up settling and staying where you are even if you do not like the results you have been living with so far. You may say, “It’s not for me” or “It is what it is” and forget your dreams.
Can you imagine how you could change without the fear? Would you give yourself permission?
Just like snakes shed their skin or caterpillars become butterflies, there is a perturbation the moment before you change. This is the dissipative structures theory. For growth to happen, a single cell organism has pressure from the outside and the pressure transforms the single cell into a more complex organism. Change is constant and necessary for the evolvement of humanity. You can evolve consciously or unconsciously.
Here is a formula for change: C = (v+b+p)>x. For more explanation, C = Change and V = Vision. A vision must be juicy and make your passion flow with what you are creating from your heart space to reality. B = Breakdown. A breakdown in a marriage is divorce, in health it’s sickness, in business it’s bankruptcy. Most people wait to change through breakdown. This is a painful way to evolve. Why not do this consciously and not wait for the big breakdowns? You can have smaller nudges to move like getting a cold, so you slow down for a minute and practice self-care. P = Plan. A plan is practical steps to achieve the goals in bite-size increments. So, some combination of vision + breakdown + plan must be greater than X which = Fear of Change. The greater the vision and plan, the less breakdown you will have in order to change.
Changing and transformation is natural and necessary for growth. You can change your fear by changing your BubbleTalk, the unconscious thoughts that keep you from getting what you want. By changing your thoughts, you can give yourself permission to transform without much breakdown.