Have you ever said something that people misunderstand? Are you afraid of telling your truth? One of the definitions of communication can be the response you get. If you are not getting the response you want from your communication, you could be having a one-way communication in your business, with your family, or friends. To have two way communication, you must be a listener (receiver) and a talker (sender).
Many of us have a fear of telling our truth because we have been reprimanded, told to shut up, bullied, or gotten in trouble for speaking up. These fears stay with us and often get projected onto others, especially our children. We learn how to communicate when we are children from our parents, teachers, culture, etc. How many times have you said, “Because I said so.” That is a one-way communication. Tell the truth with compassion and have empathy and respect for yourself and others.
It has been harder to have real communication these days since most of our communication is with a screen in front of us. Email, texting, and Facebook are just 7 percent of the essence. Picking up the phone adds another 38 percent with tone. Your tone is important when you are communicating your essence and truth. The best way to do that is in person or through Zoom or Facetime since body language is 55 percent of communication.
The four ways to assure your communication is more effective are 1) to be present, 2) take responsibility for your words, 3) create synergy by listening, and 4) say “For me the truth is . . . .” If you start your communications with “For me the truth is,” you will help with easing any defensiveness. No one can argue that that is not your truth.
Another tool to use, especially with children, is the heart of communication. Get something shaped like a heart and put it in a place that everyone knows. When you or they want to communicate something important, get the heart and tell each other “we need to have a heart-to-heart communication.” The person who got the heart starts and says, “What I feel like saying is . . . .” Use a lot of “I” words and identify your emotions. The other one listens and does not talk or interject or interrupt at all. When the first person is finished with the heart they say, “What do you feel like saying?” Then the first person actively listens without talking while the second person talks. This technique will help dissipate the energy, allow the truth to be told, and you both will be acknowledged, heard, and not misunderstood or afraid to speak up and share.