Oh, Death, Where Is Thy Sting?

By Martha Burgess Novak

Most children are resilient. From when we are conceived until we are seven years old, our focus is on one thing: survival. We go about making sense of our world which is essential for survival. We do this by creating cognitive distortions about how life works.

Let’s put it another way. To the child, life is all about avoiding death. All our issues are there to help us avoid death and the painful feelings that we associate with death, like anxiety.

It’s important to realize that we have survived and now we must turn our attention to living well. And, to do this, one of the things we must get straight with is, ironically, death.

It is my feeling that the earlier we can get comfortable with death, the more expansively we can live. To do that, we must know more about it.

I’ve said goodbye to many friends and relatives who have passed over, many of whom have been kind enough to share their experiences with me. Oddly enough, the experiences are the same:

  1. A balanced life equals an easy death. In other words, if you are afraid of death by the time you get there, you will resist and this is why many people linger on their death beds.
  2. We must learn to cooperate with the Highest Self. Consciousness opens you to a more powerful perspective and this will more than serve you now and at the end of your life.
  3. There is no “terrible death,” no matter what it looks like. Unless you resist. From the dying’s perspective, there is no drama, just intense love for and from the All There Is which the person is joining.
  4. You will choose the time of your death. No Grim Reaper is going to come along and snatch you.
  5. No one dies before their time. Our souls are in full cooperation to go with God.
  6. To the dying, it’s no more dramatic than going from room to room.
  7. And there’s so much more to it….

    For example, in the case of an airplane disaster, everyone on the plane is cooperative with what is about to happen. Their egoic child’s mind may not be cooperative, but their higher self is or they would not have boarded. It is the sheer act of terror that serves them in the end and this is a good example of why it is so important to have emotional intelligence. It is the experience of intense terror that actually puts one in an altered state so that one can die in peace.

    The bottom line is this: we must all learn to live. Dying will take care of itself. And for those who have lost loved ones like I have, you have a choice: to shut down or to increase your capacity to love by letting go in love and gratitude.

    Martha Burgess Novak is a peak performance trainer working with individuals and corporations. She also has a school for spiritual healing and development where she teaches her method and is the author of The Life You Want and The Teacup Prophecies. You can also nd her radio show on www.blogtalkradio.com/marthaburgessnovak. www.marthaburgessnovak.net